Peace

"When I was growing up, Belfast City Hall was surrounded by security, and we had no access to it. But now, people come in and out of it all the time. On a nice day, office workers and students sit on the lawn outside and have lunch. It's great to see how Northern Ireland has changed. To be part of that is fantastic." - James Nebitt

I was raised by staunch Irish parents. They were County Limerick born and raised, proud Munstermen, Catholic childhoods, Gaelic lessons in school, hurling, soda bread, black pudding, bacon and cabbage, Celtic FC the lot!

As a child I was raised Irish! I was born and raised in London but my dad in particular made sure we knew and felt we were Irish. Irish passports, Irish football kits, Irish TV, he even had us watching the Irish weather! Christie Moore and The Saw Doctors playing on the speakers. But he made sure we were aware of Irish history. He'd tell us about Michael Collins, we'd watch Angela's Ashes and The Wind That Shakes the Barley. We were told our stuff!

As I grew I adopted the nickname Paddy. Incredibly proud of my Irish heritage I began to research into Irish history. The English rule, the slave trade, the potato famine and subsequent immigration, the battles, Eamon De Valera, the quest for independence and most intriguingly the Troubles. The North, Ulster, Northern Ireland. I watched documentaries, read biographies and films and always came out seeing the North as the bad guys. I believed in a United Ireland. The Brits were no good. Should leave my beloved Ireland and that was that.

And then I fell in love with a girl who's parents were Ulstermen. Proud Northern Irish people born and raised. Protestant upbringing. They loved Ireland too and experienced much of the same Irish childhood as my parents. I visited the North for the first time a few years ago. I visited the peace walls, the murals, I heard the stories from both sides of the divide, I visited Crumlin Road Gaol and spoke to people who were immensely proud of the county Northern Ireland was becoming. The peace it was enjoying, and the future it had to look forward to.

At our wedding my father in law held up the Irish Tri Colour and spoke about the different upbringings myself and Kristin had had. Both Irish, but one in the ways of Republican Green, the other in the way of Unionist Orange. But in the middle was white. And he asked that we lived in the white. The white that symbolises peace. The peace that can be found in Christ.

The passing of Martin McGuinness this week has caused me to think seriously about peace. How precious it is, but also how fragilile it is. The peace process in Ireland has been a long hard road. Murder, tragedy, heartache, death and lies are present on both sides of the historical divide. But the peace process which McGuinness was part of, has brought hope to not just a country but to the world. And peace brings hope.

As a Christian I believe the ultimate peace is found in Christ. That He is the pinnacle of peace. The words "Peace be still" in Mark 4 assured me that I was a Christian 7 years ago. And it is my hope and prayer that Ireland, all 32 counties, might hear the gospel and know for themselves the peace of Christ. For there is no greater peace, than a peace with God, through His Son, Jesus.

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."
Colossians 3:15‭-‬17

There's No Place Like Home

"Home is where one starts from." T.S.Eliot 

Tonight is my last night in Battersea. For 27 years it's been my home. It's everything I know. It's where my family is, my memories are and where my church is! Leaving Battersea is going to be incredibly difficult. It turns my stomach but I know it's the right thing.

I'm moving to Chessington to set up a new life with my wife to be. An exciting new chapter in my life however a very scary one. I've been a visitor to Chessington for 10 years, but visiting somewhere and living there are very different things. There was a lot of prayer, discussion and arguments over the move to the suburbs. Both Kristin and I are committed to solid Bible believing churches in our respective areas, have families and friends etc etc. It was so important for us to pray about such a big decision. We believe God wants us to start married life in Chessington so its bye bye to Battersea for me.

What will I miss?

Ethnic diversity for a start! I love the cultural mixing pot that is London and Battersea certainly fits into that! I have loved growing up around people of different colours, religions, nationalties and languages. I'll miss the diversity for sure.

Tower Blocks! The Heathbrook twin towers have dominated my skyline for 27 years. Easily identifiable on the train into Waterloo seeing them on the new commute will raise a smile!

Morleys. £1.99 for 6 wings and chips or a Triple M for 99p. If you know you know! I'll miss seeing a Morleys in every shop terrace. The smell of cheap fried chicken is a growing up essential!

Battersea Park. Mine and Marshall's regular spot. Battersea Park holds too many childhood memories to mention. Playing rival estates on the astro, run outs, those big slides in the adventure playground you'd slide down on a bit of old carpet! And as an adult a place of solitude and quiet. Walking Marsh and praying. Highlight!

Lastly though and on a more serious note I'm going to miss my church and it's Sunday School. I love my church so much. The people there played a huge part on my upbringing. And as an adult and born again Christian they have been a great blessing and encouragement to me. They are true people of God determined in Gods strength to bring the Gospel to the people of Battersea, particularly children. I have headed up the Sunday School here over the last 2 years and I will miss seeing those kids each week. 35 odd kids from non Christian homes every week. Singing praise and learning the Bible and about Jesus. Ridley Hall Evangelical Church is a truly wonderful place. Full of Godly people who love me and care for me. And I will miss it immensely. I am so thankful to God for every single person in that church and for God using Ridley Hall to grow me spirtiually.

I look forward to what the future holds! But I'll always be a Battersea Boy!

Bye Battersea.Time for KT9.

Simply The Best

"I am thimply the bestht" Chris Eubank

I will make no apologies that this post in particular is very Christian. It's where I'm at at the moment and I needed to write it down so this is my latest post.

Anything that I have done in my life I have always aspired to be the best at it. I always want to be the best. I have never accepted that it's the taking part that counts. It's winning and being the best and that's that. I am highly competitive. Put me in any scenario or face me with any task and I will want to complete it to the best of my ability and be the best at it.

It's an attitude that has always allowed me to hold my own in sports despite not being the most naturally talented.

It enabled me to do well at school. I had to be the best at spelling. The best at writing. It was what drove me. Pushed me. Motivated me. Be the best.

It has followed me from school into my adult life. I want to be the best English tutor. Graded teaching observations I always want a "1 - Outstanding". As a manager I want to be the best manager that individual has ever had.

I'm getting married and want the best wedding and the best house we can get. I want to be the best husband and one day God willing the best Father.

Yet one area I feel I accept mediocrity in is my walk with Christ.

Why is that? Why do I have such high standards in all other areas of my life, but when it comes to Christ I am prepared to give him what's left, or just enough, as opposed to my all?

After all this is the same Christ who left behind the riches of heaven to die for me an unworhy sinner on the cross. He gave his all for me. His life. Yet all too often I fail to give him my best.

When I became a Christian my mum bought me a book and penned a message on the inside cover. It read "Your whole life you have tried to be the best at everything. I pray you will be the best Christian you can be".

This isn't about me being sinless. Being a perfect person. Doing good works to be the best Christian in the church. That's not what this is about. The Bible teaches we all fall short of the glory of God. Our works and behaviour don't gain us brownie points.

However God's Word also tells us how Christ gave it all, how God gave his Son. So that my sins could be forgiven. We are called to love the Lord God with all our hearts and minds. To put him first. To give him our best.

In what has been an extremely busy few months with birthdays, engagements, promotions and house hunting I have given God the scraps of my life instead of the feast. Despite being showered in blessings He is too often at the back and not the forefront of my thoughts and my life.

It's been take, take, take with very little thankfulness. Far too little prayer and even less reading of His Word. Hence the conviction this week. Thankfully I have picked up my Bible and began to read the book of Joshua. A young man chosen by God, to lead the Israelites into the promised land. Already I have learnt much from Joshua and the way in which he led.

Namely this. If I want to be the best man I can be, then it starts with giving God the best of me. With studying his Word (Joshua 1v8), with putting God first and by following Him even in difficult times (Joshua 3). We are called to live a life that honours the Lord, that is an effective witness and that glorifies our Lord and Saviour. If I do that. Then I know God will enable me to be the best I can be. I want to give my best to God.

I 

Disillusioned & Disconnected

"Look at me in the eyes and tell me that you're happy with life, when you don't feel safe unless you carry a knife. There's a lot of places worse than the endz to a certain extent but that doesn't mean nothing when they murder your friends. It's all a mess, there's no morals left, we've got 12 year old girls out having sex" Lowkey

I haven't blogged in a while. I feel blogging is a chance for me to vent when I need it as opposed to a weekly update.

The Lowkey lyrics above have always resonated with me for the simple fact that they are inexplicably truthful and uncomfortable. Young people are carrying knives and are having sex and the perpetrators are getting younger and younger.

The disillusionment I felt this week after working with a young person has had a huge impact on how I will work with young people going forward. A young person who before my very eyes went from an angry, violent and aggressive person to a distressed, lost and confused child in the space of 20 minutes has caused me to truly question several things.

1) How have our young people become so scared for their own safety that they feel they need to carry such sinister and brutal weapons to protect themselves?

2) Why do we so often fail to recognise that beneath all the exterior of our young people, that they are children and that children need love, discipline and guidance in order to flourish?

3) How do we break such an ingrained knife culture when even the death of loved ones fails as a deterrent?

4) How do we reinstall to young people the value of a life? Both their own life and the life of another.

5) Why are our most vulnerable young people so neglected and who is responsible for them?

6) Why are children no longer allowed to be children? Where have childhood innocence and societies moral compass gone?

These are just some of the questions I have been asking myself and I don't have the answers. I am a confident man and have always held  onto the fact that I understand young people and what they are going through. I really had to step back today and question that view which has caused me a real discomfort and much disillusionment. I'm not seeking answers or morale boosts from this post. I simply want people to consider the questions for themselves.

I believe God has called me to work amongst these young people and for that reason He is working all these things for good. I am trying to "be still" and know that God is in control (Psalm 46:10)

However I'm human and I am really struggling to comprehend just how our young people have been allowed to become so marginalised and disconnected from life.

I have been sent some verses by loved ones tonight that have been an encouragement.

"We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed."
2 Corinthians 4:8-9

When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, Lord , supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.
Psalm 94:18-19

I hope that over the next days and weeks I am able to cling to these comforts in His Word and continue trying to make a positive impact among London's young people.

The Need for More Compassion

"I think one of the best words in the English language is 'compassion.' I think it holds everything. It holds love, it holds care... and if everybody just did something. We all make a difference." Michael Crawford

I have never really been into politics. I have always found it baffling how the people who make the country's decisions are so out of touch and desensitised to every day people and every day life.

I have never had much time or interest in the news or media either. Since I was a child I felt we were only being told a fraction of what was happening and that very often we were given these horrific headlines and stories, passing lots of blame, but never really investigating the bigger picture. It amazed me how a story would dominate for a week and then you would never hear of the situation again. The Boko Haram kidnapping of the Nigerian school girls is a recent example I can think of.

Over the past few months the British government and British mediasresponse to the refugees fleeing war torn countries such as Syria and Iraq has been despicable. While I have never had much care for politics or media I have always had a strong care and love for people.

These people have been verbally battered by government officials. Described as if they are rats and locusts. A "swarm" invading the land. When in fact they are refugees risking their very lives in the search for security and freedom that cannot be found at home.

The media has led a vicious fear mongering campaign showing zero compassion for these vulnerable and desperate people and instead focused on selfish and arrogant defiance of an issue. Absolving blame and refusing to acknowledge cause they have honed in on "immigrants" and the lies of a  desire for benefits rather than a desire to simply live in peace. They are only now beginning to show some empathy! After months and months of distasteful headlines and reports now they want to be compassionate. The hypocrisy is shameful and they should be held accountable.

Two images have struck me in recent days. The first is of the young child, not migrant or immigrant, but a child. He is washed up on a Greek beach having drowned fleeing Syria via Turkey. Having holidayed on the island of Kos where this poor boy was found feels very surreal. 

The other is of German football fans at a number of stadiums holding banners high at matches stating they welcome refugees.

Two very powerful images. One shows the truly incomprehensible measures people in Syria and other areas of the Middle East are going to in order to reach Europe. How desperate must you be to risk not only your own life, but the life of your child, to consider it a better option to flee home and attempt to be smuggled across Europe by land and sea. Than stay put.

It also demonstrated to me that everyday people, such as football fans care about people. And even if our governments and media refuse to show compassion then at least we as individuals and a community can extend love, warmth and compassion to them.

Are we not all human? Would we not want help were we ever in desperate need? I hope we as society can open our arms up to help those we can. That we do not turn people away or bury our heads in the sand. That we recognise these are people!

Jesus said “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”(Matthew 11:28-30)

I hope that these poor people find rest. They must be so burdened by worry and fear. They must be so tired fleeing home in search for peace and comfort.

I pray we as a society may look to extend love and compassion towards them. That we follow the example Jesus set and as a nation do all we can to help.

Jesus was not only offering the release of the burden and weariness of this life. He was in fact offering a release from the burden of sin and the weariness of a life with no hope.

I pray that people around the world no matter their situation would come to Jesus and know that true and eternal peace that can only be found in Him through his sacrifice at Calvary. That he can take all our worries cares and burdens upon himself and we can be free.

Results in Perspective

"Education is not preparation for life; education is life itself." - John Dewey

It seems like just yesterday I was picking up my GCSE results, the fact that its been 10 years is actually quite terrifying.

Those tests and those results were daunting because of the pressures school and society placed on them. It felt as though the letter I received in relation to those tests not only defined my intelligence but also my identity and how my life would turn out.

Safe to say with hindsight and life experience the grade from a test, in and of itself, is no scale by which to measure a person.

It's the common misconception, people who get As are more intelligent and harder working than those stupid and lazy people who only managed Es & Fs. 

If you sat your GCSEs and got A*s and As galore a sincere well done to you. If you sat your GCSE and got a D when you were predicted an F. An equal amount of praise is deserved. No? Surely?! While the grade may not be as impressive the work ethic and study deserves significant and equal praise to an A does it not?

To achieve a D or an E, or to even just turn up to the exam is a massive achievement for many young people who have received their results today. It's not cheesey and its not an "everyone's a winner" mentality. It's just the reality of it. A young person should not be made to feel that the letter they receive from a GCSE is a indication of their character.

In society and in the education system this is not promoted. Many young people are made to feel that they should define themselves by their grades. A sad view in my opinion.

I am am advocate of hard work, of resilience, of fortitude and of perseverance. Which is why I am so immensely proud of the young people who I work with today. These are the characteristics that myself and my amazing colleagues seek to instill and promote on a daily basis and our young people have shown them in abundance. 

If you were to cast your eyes down the results spreadsheet you would see more Es than you'd see at a house rave! But these Es are a huge achievement because these learners weren't even supposed to make it to the exam hall.

One of my learners got a D! She came to us 2 years ago on an F. Has had her ups and downs, suffers from depression, alcohol and drug misuse but has worked so hard and achieved a D. The smile on her face this morning was infectious.

Another young girl is the primary carer for her mother and also cares for her younger siblings. She also secured a D despite attendance being below 70% due to family commitments.

One young man, had been removed from 2 schools and a PRU (Pupil Referral Unit) before joining us. Today he received a B. Highly deserved amidst his battle to get out of a lifestyle of gangs, violence and negative peer groups.

GCSEs are useful. I am not discrediting them. They serve a purpose no doubt. I push every learner to try their best and apply themselves. But they should not be used as an indication of who a young person is. Or what they will become.

The biggest test these young people and indeed we all face is life itself.

My favourite verse is Job 23 v 10 "But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold."

As a Christian it's a great comfort to know that my life with its ups and downs is in the hand of God. That he will give me nothing I can't handle and that in difficult times I can call out to Him to help me through. In the good times I can praise Him for his goodness to me.

My identity as a Christian, is not in my GCSEs, my A-Levels or my job. It's in Jesus Christ, my Lord and Saviour.

The Value of a Soul

"There can be no keener revelation of a society's soul than the way in which it treats its children."
Nelson Mandela

Anyone who has known me from a young age will know my passion and love for animals. No group of animals am I more passionate about than the Big Cats. I had every series of "Big Cat Diaries" taped off the TV onto VHS. I watched Lion King on repeat. I had endless books and drawings. I adore Tigers and Lions above all other animals. They are magnificent, majestic and mighty creatures. Such was their beauty that even pre conversion they convinced me of a Creator.

As I have grown up my love for animals has not waned, although becoming a vet was beyond me, I have channelled this passion into owning a Bull Terrier. I believe animals should be loved and respected and try to teach these values to the young people I work with. I have made lessons based on Blackfish, Virunga and the Dangerous Dogs Act to try and get them to broaden their understanding of wildlife and human interactions with animals.

So it might surprise some that I have found the response to the killing of Cecil the Lion this week a bit disappointing.

Cecil is no doubt a beautiful specimen and to see such a regal animal slaughtered for sport is appalling and wrong! Make no mistake about it, it's wrong. But the response in both the media and social media of outcry, outrage and mourning has struck me. I see no such response when a young teenager is gunned down or stabbed to death in London.

And herein lies my issue. The death of a lion, beautiful and fearfully made as he is, has received more media coverage and public sympathy than the deaths of young people in London and across the country receive.

I'm a Londoner through and through. So when I learn that 175 teenagers have been murdered in London in the last 10 years I'm heartbroken. How many of them can you or I name? Cecil the Lion has been granted more of an identity than the majority of these children and that causes me great discomfort.

More than my love for animals is my love for young people. I work with some of the most vulnerable in the country. I work with young people who live around guns, knives and death and are completely desensitised to the threat of them all. Of these 175 young people who have been murdered in London I worked with 1 and knew 2 others.

The media will call young people  "gang members","youths" or "hoodies" as if they therefore warrant the death that befalls them. They fail to recognise or address the social issues that lead young people into these lifestyles. I often hear "they have a choice". Yes the choice between a broken home full of abuse and neglect or the choice of a peer group that feels safer despite the threat of violence. In the borough I work in 50% of children live in poverty. They are eating from food banks with little to no parental input and people wonder why the lure of crime and quick money is so attractive to them?! 

The experiences many of these young people have had to endure by the age of 14 are enough to break an adult.

Yet when these young people are killed society affords them very little outcry, very little outrage and very little mourning.

As a society how is it that we value the life of a lion over the life of a young person?

This is not a lecture. This is just me thinking and writing but I can't help but comment on these things.

As a Christian I believe we as people have souls. We are made in God's image. So when a young person dies, I have to ask myself. What has happened to their soul? It's a question we all need to ask ourselves. Where will our soul go when we die?

Cecil had no soul. We as people do!

I feel a responsibility to tell and show young people the Lord Jesus Christ. For it is only through knowing the Lord Jesus Christ that we can be assured of an eternity in heaven. I need to tell them and show them now! Because the reality is they are walking life's tightrope everyday!

Jesus himself said “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19 v 14).

Jesus calls children and young people to come to him so that they may be with him in heaven. It's my desire to tell as many young people as I can about Jesus so they can know him for themselves.

Our priorities as society should lie in our children. They are our future. And is there any higher matter of urgency than our eternity?

I hope and pray that my young people and the others will be kept safe over the summer and when I see them again in September. I will be able to replicate Jesus love and care for them and they may desire to know Him for themselves.